I’ve always loved cartoons. To me, a cartoonist captures in a drawing and a few words the essence of a situation.

The cover of my book is a New Yorker cartoon for October 4, 1993 when I held my first focus group on the subject of women, money, men and marriage. The artist, Edward Sorel, captures with pointed humor the vulnerability of women who take seriously their husband’s seductive reassurance “Don’t Worry about a Thing, Dear”.

I have a large file of cartoons. Here are three favorites:
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A headstone bearing the name of the deceased, and below it “Member, Placebo Group.”

Another headstone bearing the deceased’s name and the inscription ‘Never sick a day in his life – and now this.”

A father with his arms around his son’s shoulder as they gaze out the window on a large factory. The caption reads “Someday, son, all this will belong to your wife!”
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Last week’s New Yorker magazine shows a cartoon with a bridal couple, in full wedding regalia, sitting in the back of the limo. She looks angry. He looks puzzled. The caption reads: “It didn’t have to end like this.”

Is this couple on the way to the altar, or leaving it? Did she just find out a secret he has that’s a deal breaker for her? Did her ex show up at the wedding, claiming he still loves her, and she feeling the same about him? Maybe she’s offended because her groom was trying to save some money by booking the deluxe honeymoon suite instead of the presidential one.

Perhaps her groom presented her with a prenuptial agreement at the last minute and expected her to sign it without her lawyer’s help? Or horror of horrors, his mother was sulking again because she wasn’t invited along for the honeymoon?

I believe some marriages are over shortly after they begin. It just takes some people longer to figure it out – or maybe longer to speak up. I think you can tell the difference between wedding jitters and deeply buried concerns about the person you’re planning to marry.

None of us marries in expectation of divorce. Except for the bride in the cartoon who says “I’m so excited about getting my first marriage out of the way.”

This entry was posted on Saturday, June 21st, 2008 at 11:29 am. Visit the archives for all blog posts.